Don’t Force It

dontforceitAre you trying too hard? It’s easy to get swept up in the “I must market my wedding business!” mindset, but it’s dangerous. Nobody likes it when you’re being pushy. I think it all comes down to fear. If you’re afraid of not having enough sales, or worse: going under, it’s a totally natural reaction to go into desperate-marketing-mode. But, please, don’t do it.

Being desperate and pushy doesn’t work. Do you like it when your Facebook newsfeed is full of self-promotional stuff? When somebody calls you because they need your business? When you get the 100th email saying “free junk” or “please stop what you’re doing and buy this!”? Nobody does.

Learn from it. It’s tempting to ignore what made you jump into gross-marketing mode, but it’s worth a closer look. What in particular made you feel like you had to go into sales mode? Where is the fear? When you know the fear, it’s a whole lot easier to squash it. Uncovering it is often enough to say, “hey, it’s really not so bad.”

Instead, be passionate. People love real, authentic passion. You are intensely passionate about what you do and who you serve. You’re probably also passionate about weird things like unicycles, garage sales or action figures. Be your weird self. Connect with people who love what you do. Put yourself out there. Be a leader in passion. Not only will it naturally lead you to the right clients, it also feels so much better.

And be generous. When the bank balance starts to dwindle, it’s tempting to say “no more!” to anything that begins with a dollar-sign. We also tend to get really greedy with our time, our connections and everything else. Do you know someone who’s stingy? How do you feel about that person? Let go of the fear and be generous again. If you don’t have a penny to spare, give up an hour for somebody who has less than you. Be really generous in connecting a rising star in the industry. When you give, everyone wins. And when the two people you connected want to do something nice for someone, who will they think of? They’ll think of you.

Business (and especially marketing) doesn’t have to feel gross. It doesn’t have to be gross. Understanding your fear, letting go of it, and replacing it with passion and generosity is a killer start to loving your business and your life. After all, when things are going well, you’re at your best and you’re having fun, what’s not to like? Live brilliantly.

Tuesday Tech Tip: Life hack with EasilyDo iPhone App

easilydoI love saving oodles of time. And I love sharing my best hacks and apps with you. I’m pretty excited about this week’s Tuesday Tech Tip: saving time with the iPhone app EasilyDo (also available for Android).

The app strives to be your personal assistant. I’ve used a few apps like this and they all have one major flaw (and EasilyDo does not escape this fate): they’re slow. Worse (I guess I’m starting with the cons this time) it’s a battery drain, even though it claims it isn’t. Because of the sweet location-based stuff it does, it needs constant access to your phone’s gps which results in serious battery loss.

If it’s slow AND  a battery hog, what makes it worth using? I’m so glad you asked. Here’s why I’m keeping it on the phone:

  1. It tells me when to leave for appointments. Seriously. I was hanging out with my new pal, Nancy, author of the super-fabulous introvert-energizer e-newsletter (if you’re an introvert, you need to be on that list), at a coffee shop today, when my phone beeped. Sure enough, it’s the EasilyDo app saying “It’s time to leave for your next appointment” with an option to go straight to Google Maps (you read that right, you can choose whether it defaults to Apple’s crappy maps or Google’s) for turn-by-turn voice-guided directions. How cool is that? It actually analyzes how much time it takes to get from where you are to where your next appointment is. Don’t rely on this, but it’s really cool when it works. And it’s super helpful for people like me who get sucked into super interesting conversations and lose track of time. Thanks, Nancy!
  2. I don’t miss birthdays. Check this out: On Friday, directly from the app, I can see who has a birthday coming up (this is all through Facebook and relies on people sharing their birthday with you) over the weekend and send them a quick note, to be sent on the correct day (automatically) at the time of day I choose. (People can tell you use the app, but I don’t think it’s that big of a deal. I mean, if you really cared, you’d call anyway, right?)
  3. It reads Facebook for me. What? That’s right. It catches me up on important and popular posts and even suggests that I congratulate someone (when appropriate). I check Facebook three times a day most days. And this app still caught important things that I missed. Word.
  4. It dials into conferences for me. I don’t know about you, but I find myself dialing into conference calls a lot. I must admit, I haven’t used this yet, but as long as your calendar-event is titled “phone number, access code#” it’s supposed to dial right in (and enter your access code for you so you don’t have to remember it, phew) with the push of a button.

This thing has saved me a ton of time. It keeps track (cool for people who like to track everything or just justify the app) of how much time it’s saved you. But here’s the thing, it says it’s saved me something like fifteen minutes. That would be true, if you only counted how long it would have taken me to do those things. But in order to check birthdays and write messages, I would need to log in three days in a row (something I’m not great at anyway) and check for birthdays. And I don’t know about you, but if I’m on Facebook, I may as well check notifications and my newsfeed. Goodbye 45 minutes. So I estimate this thing has saved me a week.

Is it worth it despite the battery-killing thing and slowness? Yup. Just make sure you have a phone charger nearby.

 

Meh to Marvelous Transformation: Day 29

For day 29 of her “Meh to Marvelous” transformation, Michelle is happy to report she’s not feeling like last week! The birds are chirping in the background, but Michelle is still struggling with how to be in a relationship with such a big energy mismatch.

Michelle was hoping that her positive attitude and outlook would rub off on the other person, but so far, no dice. In her work with coach, Jeff Hellenbrand, she’s continuing to change herself why giving the people around her permission to do what they want (that is, to change or not).

Is there someone in your life that you wish you could change? How much pain, anxiety and frustration does wanting to change this person cause you? Has it ever helped to change them? It never does. Instead of focusing on them, let’s focus on you. How can you let go of wanting to change them? How much time, energy and sanity would you have if you stopped trying to do the impossible?

No longer wanting someone to change is not the same thing as giving up on them. It’s a starting point for allowing them to change on their own (when they’re ready). It’s not impossible for someone to change, but it is impossible for someone who doesn’t want to change to change simply because you want them to. That’s just not how it works.

“Michelle came to me because she was looking to make some huge changes in her life and kickstart her new business. She’s an experienced florist living in a major city and she is totally devoted to her kids, including a daughter with special needs. Michelle’s motivation to start her own business stemmed from her desire to spend more time with her daughters. She’s keeping a video diary of her progress in this 90-day Meh to Marvelous transformation.

Day 5: Check Your Baggage: Lose the Guilt this Season

It’s Day 5 of the Simplify Your Summer series and I’m wrapping things up (except for the live Q&A session of course) by talking about ditching the guilt this Summer.

Watch the video:

If you’re ready to let go of the guilt this wedding season (and forever), here’s my formula:

  • BYOBF (Be Your Own Best Friend)
    • Realize everyone experiences needless guilt.
    • Cut yourself some slack.
    • Know that you are more than enough, just as you are.
    • Get present. Go out for ice cream, do something productive.
  • Take on the motto: “No Guilt, Just Results”
    • If you’re slacking, go big. Go skydiving. Have a picnic.
    • Don’t just sit there moping on Facebook.
    • Refuse to live in the past.
    • Instead, ask “what is the opportunity right-freakin-now?”

It’s all about changing expectations and letting go so you can be happier and more productive right now. If you want to learn more about that process, check out my blog post on Being like the Roomba®.

Get the rest of the Simplify Your Summer expert tips delivered straight to your inbox and get access to the live Q&A with Jeff Hellenbrand on May 20th at cakecoaching.com/kiss.

Day 4: Avoid the Wedding Season Website Traffic Rut

Kathy DalPra Bride AppealIt’s Day 4 and Kathy DalPra from Bride Appeal has some awesome ideas for you on how to stay ahead with content this Summer. Have a pen ready, because she’s got some homework for you. Settle in and enjoy this great mini-webinar on how to get your website traffic to make sure you stay in front of brides all season long (without pulling all-nighters to write blog posts in July).

Make sure to get on the waiting list for Bridal Traffic Domination with conversion-genius Kathy DalPra, CEO of Bride Appeal, right here: http://brideappeal.com/btd.

Get the rest of the Simplify Your Summer expert tips delivered straight to your inbox and get access to the live Q&A with Jeff Hellenbrand on May 20th at cakecoaching.com/kiss.

Day 3: Three Tips to Streamline Your Wedding Business

For Day 3 of the Simplify Your Summer series, we have some ideas for keeping it together this wedding season (and beyond) from Heather and Jennifer of Outstanding Occasions. Check it out:

Heather and Jennifer from Outstanding Occasions
If you want to simplify during wedding season, these three tips will help you streamline your wedding business so that you can really focus on your clients and their weddings.

Calendar it: Whether you use iCal, Google Calendar, a traditional paper calendar or something else, make sure that you schedule everything. In our company, if it is not in our Google calendar, it is not considered real. Each team member includes all of their tasks, appointments, vacations, blog posts, team meetings, reminders to review our monthly finances, due dates for client projects, etc. in our company calendar. If you have a team, we suggest using an online version, because (1) it can be accessed from anywhere, (2) you can email or send text messages as reminders, and (3) the calendar can easily be shared with others.

Organize it: Whether you use the traditional paper and file system or an online project management system such as Basecamp, try to organize each of your projects in a way that is easy to recognize where you are in your process. Remember, organizing is a form of planning. By taking the upfront time to consolidate your project with to do lists, meetings, due dates, etc. you will be more efficient when things are busy. Good organization results in less mistakes, avoids duplicate work and gives clear objectives for you, your client and your team. A well-run organized company is in a stronger position in a competitive marketplace.

Automate it: While we do suggest you give a personal experience for each individual client, some things can be automated and will quickly help streamline your business. Invoicing a client is one of those monotonous tasks most wedding professionals do not enjoy doing, but we must get paid. Setting up recurring billing with an online invoicing system such as FreshbooksHarvest or Curdbee can be very beneficial to your company. An automatic online billing system reduces time spent sending invoices each month, gives clients the ability to pay via credit card, and provides a more professional way to send your invoices.

Take action today so that your wedding season can run smoothly. Calendar, organize and automate it!

Get more tips from Heather and Jennifer from Outstanding Occasions on how to run an outstanding wedding business: http://www.outstanding-occasions.com/business/.

Get the rest of the Simplify Your Summer expert tips delivered straight to your inbox and get access to the live Q&A with Jeff Hellenbrand on May 20th at cakecoaching.com/kiss.

Day 2: Market, Don’t Park It: Easily Stay in Front of Brides This Summer

Blaihin Murphy Bride EnomicsIt’s Day 2 of the Simplify Your Summer series and Bláithín Murphy of Bride Enomics is here to show you how to continue to market your business (without piling more work on your plate) in the crunch of wedding season. First, check out her great tips in the jam-packed video below.

Download the killer checklist full of tips to market your business during wedding season:

[PDF] Simplify Your Summer Checklist

Thinking of hiring an intern for your wedding business? Then you’ve got to read this guide (including tips on how to use an intern):

[PDF] Hiring an Intern

Sign up for more great marketing tips from Bláithín Murphy at BrideEnomics.com.

Get the rest of the Simplify Your Summer expert tips delivered straight to your inbox and get access to the live Q&A with Jeff Hellenbrand on May 20th at cakecoaching.com/kiss.

Day 1: Taking Care of the Goods: Self Care in the Trenches

I’m kicking off the Simplify Your Summer series by talking about how to take care of yourself during wedding season. It’s way too important to gloss over and it doesn’t have to take a lot of effort. Check out the intro video:

The foundation: Minding the Self Care Trinity
You’ve got to take care of these basics, first.

  • Sleep
    • Quality is just as important as Quantity
    • pre-sleep downtime (no screens 30 mins before bed!)
    • shut out light with better blinds or curtains
  • Fuel
    • See food for what it really is: fuel for your mind and body
    • Baby Steps: Now is NOT the time to start that new fad diet. Make small changes instead.
    • Eat healthy stuff first (before the junk)
    • Out of sight, out of mind
      • Hide the processed, bad-for-you, tempting snacks behind the carrots and other good-for-you foods
  • Exercise
    • Put it on the calendar
    • Work out with a buddy (for the extra accountability)
    • Make it fun! Do things you love like hiking, swimming or kayaking
    • Incorporate it into your day (for example: make some phone calls while you go for a walk)

Now that you’ve covered the basics, create a plan for those inevitable stressful moments. I know it seems daunting when you’re already busy, but the alternative is that you’re stressed out and burned out. By making time for yourself, you can stay on your A-game and make sure that you’re at your best for yourself, your clients and your family. Remember that when you win (at self care) everyone wins.

What are your Pressure-Relief Valves?

  • Make a list of five things you can do to de-stress and recharge
  • Consider things like yoga, meditation, running, deep-breathing
  • Do nothing! Schedule 1-2 hours each week where you have no obligations
  • Be creative: What do YOU love to do that recharges you?
  • For example: have a campfire, dinner with friends, improv classes, garden, read a book

Cool Apps to help you

Get the rest of the Simplify Your Summer expert tips delivered straight to your inbox and get access to the live Q&A with Jeff Hellenbrand on May 20th at cakecoaching.com/kiss.

Meh to Marvelous Transformation: Day 28

In today’s “Meh to Marvelous” check-in video, Michelle explores an unhealthy relationship in her life. She describes how hard it is to be in a relationship with someone who has some really low energy. The “level 1″ she’s describing is the victim level. People with this kind of energy feel like they are at the effect of their lives. It can be really depressing for them and draining for everyone around them.

Want to find out about the rest of the energy levels and get your score? Take the VendorCrush Assessment to see how you’re showing up and exactly how much “level 1 energy” you have. In the coaching session that follows the assessment, you’ll find out how it’s affecting your life and business and what you can do about it.

“Michelle came to me because she was looking to make some huge changes in her life and kickstart her new business. She’s an experienced florist living in a major city and she is totally devoted to her kids, including a daughter with special needs. Michelle’s motivation to start her own business stemmed from her desire to spend more time with her daughters. She’s keeping a video diary of her progress in this 90-day Meh to Marvelous transformation.

8 Reasons Why Being Broke is Better for Business

nationaltreasureNobody likes being broke. I’ve been broke (or close) more than once in my life and I usually don’t appreciate it much at the time. As entrepreneurs, we want money. And from what I can tell, we want it for two very important, and very different, reasons. The first reason is that we want to stay alive and feed our families. The second is that we think making a lot of money will fill our need for security, stability, freedom, success, etc. We all need money to live. As for that other stuff (the need for the things money represents), money isn’t going to give you that. Get over it.

Most of the wedding entrepreneurs I know who are still working to get their business off the ground would practically kill for a loan. Any cash-bump would be a godsend at this point.

This post is for you. You don’t need a loan, a grant or a large settlement. You don’t. Being broke is actually better for business and I’m going to show you why:

  1. You can’t throw money at problems. Throwing money at problems is a short-term solution that is almost always wasteful. If you don’t have money, you have to actually address the issue-at-hand. Getting to the root of the problem and taking care of it (rather than covering it up by throwing cash around) is a much healthier, cheaper and more responsible, long-term solution.
  2. The success of your business will probably not come down to money. I’ve heard people say that the number one reason businesses fail is because they don’t start out with enough capital. Okay, you need way more money to start a business than you think you do – I totally agree on that (I’ve lived it). But I see this as a total cop out. Money is one of many resources. How about connections, time and hustle? Are you using those to the best of your ability? Learning to fully harness resources other than money is probably one of the best things you can do for yourself and your business.
  3. It forces you to hustle. People who’ve made it sometimes sit back and enjoy their success while their business slowly goes under. Just see Richard St. John’s 4-minute TED talk. If your bank account is hovering just above zero, you have no time to waste. You’re forced to spend your time on your most important job: getting paid.
  4. You have the added motivation of thinking money will make you happy. Most rich people eventually learn that money truly can’t buy happiness (again, see Richard’s TED talk, link above). If you’re broke, you haven’t figured that out yet. You can use the double motivation of money and happiness to make your business successful, even though you’ll only end up with money and not necessarily happiness.
  5. You don’t waste money. Companies who begin making cash hand over fist often start spending money like there’s no tomorrow. After all, if there’s money in the bank, why not spruce up the office and buy that new car, right? When you’re broke, you don’t have extra cash to spend. You properly vet advertising opportunities and other investments because you can’t afford to mess it up. This results in better decisions, better returns and more money in your pocket.
  6. You take REALLY good care of your clients. I offer a money-back satisfaction guarantee. There were times in my business where it would have been difficult for me to come up with a refund – I was that broke. Thankfully, no one had any reason to request a refund. During that time, I worked hard. Not just to get new business, but also to look after my clients. I knew that a great experience meant a killer review, which would ultimately lead to more business. Companies with cash sometimes think it’s not their job to make every client happy. You’re too broke to think that way. Every client matters. A lot.
  7. You have to be creative. People with too much money can waste it on print ads and bridal expos that don’t work. Not you. You have to find other ways to get the right clients. Whether it’s inviting a fellow vendor to coffee for one-on-one networking (and brainstorming), creating a one-of-a-kind bridal event with other vendors or volunteering in an organization with plenty of engaged folks (or something even cooler, even more out-there that no one else has tried before), you’re doing things that other vendors just aren’t doing.
  8. Being broke is good for the soul. And a happy soul is good for business. When you’re broke, you can’t fill the voids in your life with money. For me, that’s meant that instead of expensive activities used as an escape (read: hookers and blow), I choose to spend time on soul-replenishing stuff like taking the pugs for a long walk, spending more time with my wife and playing pickup basketball. Doing things that matter with people you love makes you grounded and connects you with you. Then, when you’re in a sales meeting (for example), instead of slipping into “salesy” you, you stay who you are, because you actually know who you are.

Alright, that’s my list. What do you think? Am I insane? Am I right? Do you feel better about being broke yet?

Being broke may be good for business at first, but it’s no way to live long term. If you’re tired of being broke, take the Get Better Brides Process to find out where you’re going wrong. Join the Bootcamp: Meh to Marvelous in 6 Weeks. Hire a marketing consultant. See a shrink. Do something.